The longest night of the year is almost here

In just a few days, we will reach the darkest day of the year. December 21st marks the winter solstice and the longest night. The longest night also signifies that we will soon be returning to the light, the days growing just a bit longer each day.

When we look to nature during this season, we see the many elements of rest. Trees have lost their leaves, the ground is dormant producing less or nothing, the animals are hibernating, and the sun is only out for a few hours each day. You might notice your own energy ebbing, the need to stay home more, craving for more sleep, or a desire to get cozy under blankets and rest. That’s seasonal living! It’s the opposing effects of darkness and light.

I’m bringing back a favorite repeat from last year all about how you can celebrate this winter season and lean into the desire for more rest and coziness.

do5ive

1. Say no

If you want to stay home, say no. If you just want to curl up under a blanket and read your book, say no. If you want to sit by the fire and do a puzzle, say no. Having plans with yourself is reason enough to say no to plans with others.

Or, invite people over for cozy time together. Gatherings don’t have to be formal. You can wear your comfy pants and sit next to one another in silence while reading or doing a puzzle by candlelight.

I found this story from last year’s newsletter and it reminded me of my own power to say no:

“A few weeks ago, when my husband and I were in New Mexico, we were invited to dinner by friends. I was in the middle of a burst of creativity, able to write non-stop and get my ideas on paper, so I decided to stay home and keep working.

When Mars got back from dinner later that night, he shared this story with me: A friend of a friend was also at dinner. When they asked if I was coming later and Mars told them I’d decided to stay home, he replied, “I didn’t know it was an option to say no just because I didn’t want to go.”

The only person who can give you permission is yourself. And if you really feel like you need permission, here it is: Some eccentric lady on the internet gives you permission to not go to that thing. You have other plans. You have plans to rest and take care of yourself.

2. Rest, reflect, restore

The flavor of winter is all about hibernation, composting, reflecting, and rejuvenating your energy. As the year slowly winds to a close and we turn the calendar over into a new year, this time is ripe for reflection and restoration.

Resist the temptation to start setting big goals for 2025. First, settle in for some reflection. Look back through your calendar or planner. Flip through the photos on your phone. Sit down for a few journaling sessions to reflect on how you spent your time this past year. Was it in alignment with your values?

While you’re reflecting, this can also be a great time to think about what you’re ready to shed. Just like the trees shake off their dead leaves, what are you wanting to leave behind in 2024? You don’t have to take everything with you into 2025.

Before we can set goals, we have to know what worked in the past and what didn’t. I can get into a perfectionist cycle around reflection and want to do it in one big chunk, like spending an entire day journaling and reflecting. And honestly, never once has that worked for me. So, this year, I’m going to try reflecting a couple of times a week for 15-20 minutes.

3. Create a cozy, warm, and light-filled atmosphere

A common Yule tradition for the winter solstice is to keep a fire burning all night. This keeps the darkness and bad spirits at bay on the longest night of the year. It also makes your space super cozy and filled with light.

Last year, I stumbled upon the YouTube yule log which led me to cute winter landscapes and it’s become a tradition throughout the year. I put one of those seasonal videos up on the TV, put on some music, light candles (in the fall and winter mostly), and get cozy.

This past year, I’ve leaned into the seasons. They aren’t just something that happens around us but are something that happen inside us. I celebrate the changing of the seasons through food, scents, lights, decorations, and activities. It felt a little silly at first, felt a little childish, but now I’d know no other way to live.

When the darkness of winter sets in, I light a fire. It feels like one of the oldest, wildest, most primal things I can do. And, it might only be on the TV but it warms my soul.

4. Spend time with nature

Something new I’ve started this year is feeding the birds. We’ve had birdfeeders for ages but the birds rarely seemed to come. The birdseed would simply rot in the feeder, so I gave up. Then this year, right before the cold snap, someone reminded me that the birds were going to be hungry. So, I put out some seed. And the birds have been prolific! I look out the window and there are a dozen or more of them happily eating seed and chattering to one another. (We’ve even had a few sightings of painted buntings!)

While winter can feel or appear dead in a lot of ways, there’s so much life under the surface. You just have to look a little bit harder than in the spring and summer. This winter, take a moment to get outside and appreciate all that nature has to offer, even in this dark, cold season. You might even make an offering to nature, such as putting out birdseed, making an edible ornament, or collecting some fallen leaves to bring inside as reminders of the season.

I love to take walks in the cold. (I mean, it is Texas cold, y’all) I bundle up and hit the sidewalk. My nose gets frozen and my breath fogs in front of me but I love it. No matter the season, nature has something beautiful to offer us. We just have to stop a moment and listen for her lessons.

5. Bring in wintery scents and ingredients

A new tradition I started this year to close out summer was to bake or cook something seasonal. And there’s no better time of year to bake than winter. Fire up the oven and fill your home with the delicious scents. If you’re not a cook or baker, make some hot mulled wine, brew up a special tea, or set up a simmer pot.

Bringing in live greenery, steeping a cinnamon tea, or stirring up dough for spiced muffins are all great ways to lean into the scents and ingredients of winter.

There are so many different ways to celebrate the season. What are your traditions or rituals to celebrate winter, yule, or other winter holidays?

The other 5ive

1. What I’m learning/reading: Their anxiety is not your anxiety. You don’t have to pick it up. I love this explanation for professional situations but it will also 100% work with friends and family.

2. What I’m grateful for: Susannah Conway is back with her brilliant Unravel Your Year reflection document for 2025. And, last week’s link failed, so I’m sharing Study with Merve again—which is great for those of us who like to body double and work.

3. What I’m cooking: This cake reminds me of the apple cider doughnuts at apple orchards in the winter.

4. What I’m listening to: Charlie Brown Christmas album—my favorite.

5. What I’m loving: What to text a friend. I love clear communication, especially in texting. When you mean it, tell people. “I MEAN THIS GENUINELY AND WITH NO SUBTEXT.” Powerful words.